Sunday, 22 April 2012

Pyjama Boy, Cat Lady and Internet Dating

Driving home from shopping in town today I noticed two things simultaneously which made me chuckle. The first was a guy about to cross the road in front of me wearing his pyjamas which were two inches too short for him. He was also wearing what looked like moccasins. Had he just randomly been kicked out of his house by a disgruntled (ex) girlfriend or was he returning home after some covert mission to track down the person who had obviously stolen all of his clothes?

Cat Lady and Pyjama Boy
The reason I had stopped to let him pass (apart from taking a photo) was the second amusing thing. The lady driving the car in front of me was about 150 years old, driving approximately 2 miles an hour and breaking at any leaf that blew across the road. OK so I may be slightly exaggerating but you get the idea.

Apart from her terrible driving, the other thing that made her interesting were all the cat stickers in the back window of her car urging people to 'Break for cats' (I'm sure that's illegal) and other cheesy cat sympathiser-type things. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against cats but somehow I instantly felt sorry for her. What's her story? She's obviously a lady with about 9 cats (3 of which are pregnant) and she spends her days feeding them, brushing them and cleaning out kitty litter.  My first reaction was, "Please don't let that be me one day".

I think this is a fear that many single women have. I am very judgemental of myself and feel that guys will look at me, see I have a son and instantly judge me for having 'baggage'. Then when my son is old enough and leaves home I won't be attractive enough to pull anyone and I'll have to get a cat, which will turn into four cats, which will turn in fifteen cats and someone will find me dead one day covered in cat pee and Whiskas.

About a month ago I decided to try and take a hold of my own destiny when it comes to dating. I really can't take a chance on meeting a guy out and about. Firstly, I don't get out much, and secondly, the kind of guy you meet drunk and in a club is usually just after a one-nighter.  Would I want more than that anyway from an encounter that was based purely on lust?

I paid to join an internet dating site for 3 months to give it a try. I know lots of friends of friends who have tried it and are now happily married so, why not? The first month has been interesting. I've been invited out on a few dates but whether it's location or just the guys themselves I have always found an excuse not to bother. I've had the odd weirdos who upon emailing me for the first time have said things like, "What's your boob size?", "You're f*****g me tomorrow", "Do you have Skype?" and a short Glaswegian told me, "I'm small but perfectly formed."

As I didn't feel I was really getting anywhere and the site seemed to be more focussed around people in London I joined one of the free dating sites yesterday too. Well, there are instantly more hotties available and I've already had some nice emails from some nice looking fellas who are tall (I'm 6' 1") and actually live near me! The drawback, however, is that with the larger volumes of people come the larger volumes of weirdos.  I have already had an invitation to join a threesome.

We'll see how this new site goes over the next few days and you never know, maybe Pyjama Boy will be a member....



1 comment:

  1. Small but perfectly formed??? The latter yes, but the former? Was the man blind or was he standing on a table at the time?

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